Low Tech

I remember my first computer.

Touchstones like that are more commonly the First Car, First Pet, First Love, First Kiss.

Of course I recall all those too - but household computing defines the turning point in the information age. And that's where I live.

My first computer was an old 286 clone that I was given by friends in trade for services as the Gardener at Chez Graham. This may be where I developed my affection for making thing grow neatly; I certainly fought the Idea at the house in the Sticks. Mom kept a pretty extensive vegetable garden. Weeding it was one of the worst menial chores on the docket.

Things change.

Dad took some time to embrace technology, but not so long as you'd think. His office at his elementary school in the Sticks picked up the education standard in the fall of 1982; the Apple //e.

I'd had a marginal amount of experience with them at that point; friends of mine had parents who were notorious early adopters of technology - especially that which would benefit the advancement of their children's scholastic educations. They were both teachers. All three boys have degrees. Two have Doctorates. They're all extremely intelligent, well-rounded and successful in their fields.

Just sayin.

The first time Dad went to take a poke at his office Computer, he called me at the house.

"How do I get this thing to work?" He asked.

"Well, just type MENU, and hit the enter button."

"Ya, I know about that. How do I turn it on?"

And that was my first experience as Tech Support. It wouldn't be my last.

One notes that the next generation of personal computers had the power switch up front, and labelled.

Go figure.

Dad loved computers. He had, prior to that, an electronic chess board that had 10 levels of play, and he played it a lot; none of us could ever present much of a challenge for him. It got to the point where he would routinely beat it on its highest setting.

He had other challenges, as all working folk do. He loved his students, school, and staff, but had... challenges... dealing with a School Board rife with political agendas - especially his Superintendent at the time.

He was discussing his frustration with that particular person on Saturday afternoon in my 14th year, when I had a (for me,  exceedingly rare) Moment of Clarity.

"You know that chess game of yours?" I asked him. "I think it's kind of like that. You're playing at level 10 against a level 2 opponent."

Dad stood there looking at me for another one of those Longest Moments in Recorded History. It would not be the last time I saw that look... but it would be infrequent.

And then he started to laugh.

"Kid, you're exactly right, you know that?" and that was the last time I ever recall seeing Dad stressed from work.

It would, of course take me many, many years to understand the truth which I had, in my naïvety, spoken. I have since become a student of Hanlon's Razor and the Dunning-Kruger Effect, but I, as I occasionally do, digress.

Anyway, Dad also saw fit to let us have a really cool, second generation Video console in the mid 80's, under the rationale that it was good for hand-eye coordination, and problem solving. We got a little Intellivision II console... and played it until I had to re-engineer the hand controllers so the buttons worked.

I Loved Sub Hunt. Atlantis was pretty cool, too.

Dad would eventually commit all his writings and gaming to a third- or fourth- generation Mac. He spent a lot of time on it until the fall of 1997. I've salvaged what I can of his writing over the years, and have, on more than one occasion, threatened to publish it out here somewhere where it can be enjoyed. He'd like that.

And I like to think he'd really get a kick out of where his Mac home computer has taken western Society.

Well... maybe to a point.

I call Mom once a week, every Friday evening. Depending on how tired she is, and how much stimulation she's had through the day, her memory is either crystal - or not so much. Less of both is usually better for lucidity. For the most part, I get to repeat the same jokes, stories, blog posts, and she always laughs. I find it rather cathartic, and pleasant closure to a usually hectic week. I always feel like she's happy to hear from me.

This last time, she said in an offhand sort of way "Well, My watch does everything..."

I chuckled a little at that. "What?" she said. "It tells me the time, the day, the Date..."

This is a digital she's had for probably a dozen years. Mom was never quite so interested in technology as was Dad.

I've seen my Mother's cell phone. From a couple years ago. It was a ridiculous, obsolete brick then, too. She only ever turned it on when she wished to call out.

I said Mom didn't particularily embrace current technology. I didn't say she didn't have good ideas.

So I explained the current level of technology that is the Standard Issue Smartphone. Calendar, Address Book, World-Wide Instant Communications portal, Library, Encyclopedia, Phonebook, Interactive Map, Camera, Video camera, Stereo system, Music Library, Entertainment platform, Voice memo recorder, GPS Unit, and on, and on, and more computing power than NASA used to send Neil to the Moon in '69.

All arranged neatly in a package sized to fit in the palm of your hand. It's very nearly miraculous.

Mother was suitably impressed. Or perhaps asleep. I was almost assuredly Oxidizing by then.

As a matter of fact, I've been watching a series of television programming from the BBC dating back to the mid 70's called Connections. It's an excellent series starring James Burke. I highly recommend it.

The fact that I watched it in my home, on my wireless network, using my hand-held tablet, merely enhanced the delicious irony of the content.

I must admit, also, that I wrote the majority of this posting lounging beside the pool at my Brother- and Sister-in-Law's house.

On that same Tablet.

It's awesome. I used to tell people right when the Internet got interesting that I didn't know everything... but I knew where to find it.

And THAT is the other side of the sword. Smart devices are going to make us all Dumb, I swear. Nobody has to remember anything any more.

Kids don't know their own phone numbers because it's speed dial. #1.
Can't read a map because the GPS tells us to turn in 50 meters.
Can't look up anything unless it's on Google.

And most recently there's been an alarming trend of kids walking into disaster, Ears budded, eyes down.

And sometimes... driving.

Man, don't even go there.

And -  Pretty Soon we'll be wearing them... or they will be integrated into us.

It's gonna make us Dumb. Maybe that's how SkyNet wins.

Evidently Mom's been making noise about wanting a computer. I think we'll check her out on an iPad first. See how it goes...